


Rescued

by wickedradical



Category: Undertale (Video Game)
Genre: Abandoned Work - Unfinished and Discontinued, Emetophobia, Flavortext!Chara, Narrator Chara, Other, Panic Attacks
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-05-11
Updated: 2016-10-12
Packaged: 2018-06-07 17:29:36
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 15
Words: 19,020
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6816760
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/wickedradical/pseuds/wickedradical
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>After you jumped down that hole, you didn't expect anything but pain and death. What you especially didn't expect to find was a beautiful so-called 'monster.' This woman would care for, and eventually, fall in love with you.</p><p>That is, if someone else, a so-called 'human,' doesn't get in the way.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Lost and Found

**Author's Note:**

> hoppin aboard the self-indulgent tori/self fic train yoo  
> this is what i spend my time writing instead of my flowiel fic OwO;;

You rubbed your head slowly, letting a grimace cross your face as you felt a rather large bump forming on your head.  _That stupid flower…_  You _thought_ it was innocent, but your previous encounter just went to show that you should _never_ judge a book by its cover. You figure that your nose is bleeding, because you feel pain blossoming out from the center or your face, throbbing dully. The taste of metal coats your mouth, and your tongue laps out, trying to taste anything else. _Bad idea._ Your face is covered in dirt and grass, and you just got a huge mouthful of it.

You were so busy trying to wipe your tongue on your hoodie sleeve(in an effort to rid yourself of the taste of earth) that you didn’t even notice the white monster towering above you. She is looking at you expectantly, as if waiting for an answer to a question. Too bad you were busy slobbering all over your sleeve to notice. _Nice going, she probably thinks you’re some disgusting weirdo now._

But these thoughts soon leave your head as she speaks. Her voice is smooth and sweet, like buttermilk and rose petals. You revel in the sound, gaping up at the magnificence above you. Her face suddenly contorts into a worried expression, voice reaching a higher octave. “My dear?” You finally understand what she’s saying, her formerly soft voice not as pleasant whilst tainted with fear. You start to stutter out a response, face turning redder and redder by the second. “Are you okay, my child?” The monster frowns.

You’re about to cry, so upset that you’ve made her worry. Her beautiful demeanor- Calm carmine eyes, curly fur wrapping her form like milk, small, modest horns- all drooping in concern. And that was _only_ her face! The monster’s body was wonderfully plump, clothes a simple robe with long, flowing sleeves that you just wanted to curl up in. Her breast was lovingly embroidered in a simple symbols, a winged circle with mountain-like triangles below. Her eyelids are framed by long, dark lashes, pupils dilated in surprise.

You realize you _still_ haven’t given her a coherent answer.

_Crap._

You start crying, so embarrassed at your situation, that you’ve managed to fall down this mysterious hole and meet a beautiful, kind woman, only to look like a pathetic child. That’s all she’d ever see you as. A little kid that was lost and hopeless, that couldn’t make it on her own.

Not that she was wrong, but you tried to think highly of yourself, you really did!

Even though you could barely cook and only had a meager job of babysitting from time to time, you still had a little bit of pride! You were sure, one day, you’d be able to launch your career on art or writing. All the doodling and fanfic reading you’ve done would have to amount to something, right? Maybe if your voice stopped cracking, you could even sign up for voice acting..

Oh, who were you kidding? You were never going to get anywhere.

That’s why you’d jumped down this stupid hole. You figured that you’d end your stupid, pointless life, but you hadn’t even managed to break a single bone on your way down! Somehow, magically, you were perfectly fine.

And now you were stuck in a world full of strangers that weren’t even human. Absolutely  _w_ _onderful_ for someone who had awful social anxiety, wasn’t it?

You curled in on yourself, pulling your red hood up to cover your face in shame. Sniffling, you frantically wiped at the snot leaking from your nose. It seems your sleeves would get no respite from filth anytime soon.

The tall monster was a little shocked by your sudden display of emotion, then slowly knelt down beside you.

You could see her out of the corner of your eye, past your messy bangs. Shying away out of embarrassment, you curled in further, hiding your face completely.

She paid no mind, it seemed, as you felt warm arms wrap around your trembling figure. Giving up, you sank into them, no doubt smearing dirt, blood and tears all over her careful stitched robe. You felt bad for ruining it, and even guiltier at how selfish you were, staying in her embrace, dirtying her further and further. She rocked you back and forth slowly, in a calming motion, softly caressing your smaller form. The fur on her arms tickled your nose, and you sneezed, managing to cover her arm in snot. _Wonderful._

The monster only laughed it off, saying nothing. That was good. You figured you’d be too preoccupied with all your mixed feelings to hear, much less _understand_ what she would be talking about. She must’ve felt the same way, it seemed like she knew exactly what you wanted. Despite your rough start and your undeniably awkward circumstances, you felt much calmer, and daresay… even _happier.._

After a while of rocking you back and forth and humming what you assumed to be some sort of lullaby, she exhaled softly. You glanced up at her, wiping away the residue your gross sobbing had left behind. She reached out a clawed hand softly, and gently pushed back your hood and bangs, revealing your face. Immediately, you looked away, blushing. The horned monster then leaned down slowly to give you a kiss on the forehead.

“My child,” she started quietly, voice like music. It was similar to a melody you’d once heard, but you couldn’t recall the tune, although the déjà vu was definitely there. Perhaps you’d heard it in some show or video? It was like a light music box being played, slow, yet determined to keep on going. It was comforting, to say the least. “Perhaps,” the woman continued. “We should get you cleaned up? Rest and a slice of warm pie would do you good. At my home, you may receive all these things.”

You can only nod in response, speechless. After all, if you _tried_ to speak anyways, your voice would probably crack and you’d go and make a fool of yourself again. Best to stay quiet for now. Standing up on shaky legs, you taker her outstretched hand for balance. Feeling it, you marvel at how soft and squishy it is, almost like the paw pads on a cat, but oh so much bigger.

She guides you away, walking down several paths that you are too tired to remember or even care about. At one point, you could swear you’re walking over a bridge made of spikes, but you later chalk it off to being delusional from lack of sleep and meds.

All that mattered now was that you were safe.


	2. Welcome Home

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> wow this is fun to write !! i can't believe i got so many words into these chapters, and only over the course of two days ;w; this may become my longest and most well-updated fic yet, i'm having a lot of fun writing this! hope y'all enjoy uwu

Once she'd arrived at her home, the monster started to beckon you in, but stopped, shock spreading across her features. “Oh my! How rude I’ve been, dear!” You cock your head in confusion, too tired to ask about what had gotten her into such a tizzy all of a sudden. After all, those purple stairs did quite the number on your uncertain legs. She soon explains herself, letting go of your hand to bow her head and introduce herself. “Greetings. My name is Toriel, I am caretaker of the Ruins.”

When she lets go of you, you stumble back awkwardly, coming to a heavy slump against the doorframe. You let out a grunt as you get hit square between the shoulder blades, introducing yourself through gritted teeth. You briefly think about explaining your situation and why you came down, but you figure it can wait until later. Best to keep the current conversation happy, right? You’d already had your sob-fest, no need for another one mere minutes later.

Toriel nods at your unique name, remarking at how pretty it sounds. You consider for a moment, that every human name would sound unique to a monster such as herself. This is a place of monsters, not humans, after all, and the first two(and only) monsters you’ve met have certainly strange names. Not that that was a bad thing! You just don’t think you’ll find any human-like names down here. You return the compliments, mentioning how you’ve never heard such a lovely name.

She laughs it off, smiling. You notice for the first time two curved fangs jutting out from her plump upper lip. Fangs weren’t the correct word, really, since that made them sound threatening. These two teeth only added to her pretty appearance, giving her a look of someone prettier, and almost higher up, as if she was out of your league.

Your face turns red again. You shouldn’t keep thinking about how attractive she was! After all, you were sure she only saw you as some kid that fell down, and nothing more. You don’t want to learn that your feelings are unrequited and risk facing rejection, you’d never be able to face the white monster again after that. So, best to play it off and not reveal your deeper feelings until she explicitly stated she felt the same way.

Quite frankly, you doubted she ever would.

But that didn’t matter. You two now knew each other’s names, and thus were a little closer. Maybe, if you dreamed, hoped, wished  _hard_ enough, she’d return your feelings. It seemed only time could tell.

Lovey dovey thoughts aside, you cautiously stepped through the doorway, and couldn’t help but be a little anxious.

The house had a cozy little cottage-like look from the outside, and its modest inside only added to how quaint it was. Soft music played from an unknown source, soft strums of a guitar or some other stringed instrument. Well, you assumed it was stringed. You aren’t very good at listening for instruments, and you were only in band a few years before quitting. It sounded familiar, giving you the same sense of déjà vu as Toriel’s voice.

The sweet smell of cinnamon immediately hit your nose, and you breathed it in deeply, calming down. This house smelled amazing. Your stomach is growling before you even have to time to recognize what it’s doing. Luckily, Toriel doesn’t seem to notice. She walks in after you, taking your hand and leading you down the right hallway. She explains that she has a spare room that you can stay in, and across the hallway from it is a small bathroom.

A quick peek inside showed that it was pretty generic for a bathroom, showers, sink, toilet. Good thing, too, you weren't sure what to expect, what with this being a house primarily for monsters. Hopefully you wouldn’t have too much trouble figuring out the controls. After all, it seemed that everyone had a different type of shower, and that stressed you out may more than it should’ve. But really though, who wants to strip down naked in an unfamiliar bathroom only to have to walk out in nary anything but a towel, just to ask their guest how to operate the dang heat knob?!!

You shook your head of its thought, clearing it to glance at the white monster who guided you here. She dips her head, speaking softly, “My child, I am sorry, but I must leave.” Your eyes widen in fear, afraid to be left alone, before she puts her hands on your shoulders. It is a comforting gesture, but nowhere near enough to calm you down enough. “I must get supplies for dinner, please do not worry.”

Your shoulders visibly slump as you exhale in relief.  _It’s okay. Everything is okay. You’re just a big ol’ dummy for overreacting._  You mentally chastise yourself, then get forcefully pulled out your thoughts by the touch of Toriel’s arms against yours. They slowly wrap around your body, and you relax into the furry, warm touch. She holds you for a moment, then slides away with a hum. Glancing at your face to check that you are not crying yet again(and you arent! You pride yourself on this fact), she smiles as she sees that you are okay and emotionally stable. “Feel free to make yourself at home, young one.” With that, she is gone, leaving only the smell of cinnamon and sugar in the air.

You’re a little disappointed to be alone so soon again, but shrug it off.  _She’ll be back_ , you assure yourself pointedly.  _Don’t be such a crybaby._  You decide to check out your new room, an amused smirk playing score your lips as you realize that everything is more suited to a child than to a teenager such as yourself. You start inspecting the various items in the room, humming along to the mysterious music box.

The tall wardrobe against the far wall is filled with striped sweaters, and despite the fact that they are fitted for children, you decide to change into one. Off came the ratty, dirt-covered hoodie and thin tank top you had underneath, on came a simple light blue and white sweater. You marvel at how the threads don’t seem to be straining at all, the sweater is rather stretchy. Toriel must’ve been prepared for kids(or teens, in your case) of all sizes. You briefly wonder if she made the sweaters herself as you sloppily toss your hoodie and tank onto the top of the trunk that lays at the end of your bed. A quick look into the trunk reveals a plethora of dusty toys. Perhaps you’ll play with them later, despite your older age, you aren’t quite that mature. You’d just better not let your new guardian catch you playing with them. She’d surely tease you, and that would be embarrassing!

Next, your gaze wanders to the bed. It’s pretty small, but then again, you’re a pretty small person. Granted, you’re practically twice the age of the kid this bed was most likely designed for, but you never really got a noticeable growth spurt. A thought surfaces in your head:  _Does Toriel think I’m actually a kid? Should I explain that I’m older, or does she know, and just calls me a child because that’s what she calls everyone?_ You have memories of joking around, calling your friends your children, and hope it’s merely that. The white monster that found you here is too pretty to be just another figure, you’d rather be friends.

Heck, she’s so pretty, you’d love to be more than friends, but you try not to get ahead of yourself.

You take off your shoes, a ratty pair of black hand-me-downs from an older brother. Suddenly, a foul stench hits you, and you’re sent reeling back, only to realize that it’s your own feet.  _Gross._  You wiggle your toes, remembering that you'd hadn’t been wearing socks. Heck, you almost never did. Granted, that didn’t help with the smell, most likely. Oh well. You didn’t really care.

You were too tired to be thinking much of anything, sitting on a comfy bed in a soft sweater, house warm and sweet-smelling and softly playing music. Who wouldn’t be sleepy? You certainly were, even aside from your usual narcoleptic tendencies.

So, you curled up under the thin blankets, figuring that you’d get a nap in while Toriel went off shopping or wherever. She’d be back, you’d be here in bed. This day was good, now that you had nice things to look forward to. You reached over the turn out the lamp, and the music changes, to a lighter, lullaby-like beat. It was more suited to sleeping, and you appreciated it. You figured that your guardian must’ve put a lot of thought into the house, what with setting up a music box in the lamp. At least, you assumed that’s what she did.

Lights off, music playing, you felt so relaxed and peaceful. You’re glad you fell down here, glad you met Toriel. Even getting your butt kicked by that stupid flower had been worth it, because you were here now, all because of it.

And with images of deep crimson eyes and neatly groomed fur in your mind, you peacefully drifted off to sleep.


	3. Washing Up

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> home is where u know how ur gosh diddly darn shower works (pls tell me I'm not the only one who has this problem)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i really should space out my updates so u didn't have to wait a week but oh well

You wake up to the scent of fresh pie, and hear humming from another room. You assume it’s Toriel, as it sounds different from your music box lamp.

Pushing your covers off hastily, you grimace as you realize that you’re covered in sweat. You move to pull off your sweater, but it seems your new guardian has taken your old hoodie and tank top. Well, you assume she has, because they are not on the trunk as you left them. A quick look into the wardrobe confirms your suspicions, as your clothes are nowhere in sight. So the sweater stays on.

As you actually get out of the bed to stand up, you muse on how you sweater is drenched in sweat. How ironic. Soon these thoughts throughs disappear, as the smell of food reaches you once more. Tiptoeing gently out into the hallway, your bare feet make a quiet pitter-patter noise. You hadn’t seen the rest of the house, so you figured now was a good time.

Stairs lead down to who knows where, you ignore them. Spotting a table with a vase, you walk over to sniff the flowers. They smell amazing, but are littered with pollen, causing you to sneeze loudly, giving away your position to Toriel. The white monster had been in the kitchen, a mere room away. Upon hearing you, her head shoots up in surprise. “My child!” She turns around, an endearing smile on her face.

Just when you forgot how cute she was, she goes and does stuff like this again.. You’re suddenly wrapped in a big, furry hug, smelling of flour and dough. Your face reddens a little, almost as if she could read your thoughts.

 _Look._ You told yourself sternly. _She doesn’t think of you as anything but her child. She loves you, yes, but not like that. Stop it. Stop. Stop, stop, stop._ You tried chastising yourself in vain, Toriel’s snout rubbing up against your neck in a way that made you forget about any possible worries. You relaxed into the touch, unable to keep a smile from sprouting across your face.

Your guardian laughed softly, plump body shaking slightly. “You slept well, I presume?” She leans back to see your face, but retains body contact, her soft paws settled lightly on your shoulders. You nod vigorously, and thank her for washing your clothes. It’s only now that she realizes that you are wearing one of her sweaters. At this, she chuckles, and your face starts burning in a blush.

“What?” You ask, wondering why she’s laughing. She couldn’t be making fun of you! _Could she?_ Your inquiries are soon answered as she lets loose another chuckle, covered her mouth with a clawed hand. “My child, you look adorable! Although.. The sweater is a bit big for you, is it not?” The monster chuckled again, and your face only heats up further. You look away, but she moves your head back to face her with a gentle paw. “You may wear that for now, while you clothes are getting cleaned. Do you like it?” You nod, still fairly embarrassed at her actions. She takes it all in stride, grinned her fanged grin. “I must say, you _do_ look rather adorable.” With that, you are awarded with a kiss on the forehead.

You nearly fall over, you’re so shocked, flustered, embarrassed, you’re dying over here and Toriel is only laughing. Suddenly, a more concerned look hardens her features. You tilt you head a little, scared of what may happen next. _Is she mad?_ You get your answer as she reaches up to ruffle your hair. “You should get washed up before we eat, my child, dinner will be a moment. I trust you know where the bathroom is?” Exhaling in more relief than you really should be feeling, you nod slowly. Your guardian bids you farewell, plodding back over to the kitchen counter on large, furry paws.

You decide to watch her for a moment, as she hums and whips up a salad full of greens. It looks fairly normal, but in the Underground, you never really know… Monsters were weird. Well.. Weird wasn’t the best word, really, they were just.. Interesting. Unique. Amazing. Lovely. Beautiful. Upon catching yourself gushing over the white monster once more, you shake your head, deciding that you really _should_ take a shower. It’ll help clear your head, _and_ the sweat and grime off of your features.

Trekking over to the bathroom, you strip your sweaty clothes off, piling them in a heap on the sink countertop. You look in the shower at the different knobs, and are hit with an immediate sinking feeling. _Ugh…._ You mentally groan, too tired to do so physically. The shower knobs, just as you feared, are completely different from those that you are used to. You briefly consider putting your clothes back on and asking Toriel how to operate it, but that would be awkward.. So you step on in, deciding to figure them out yourself. Seeing the large, mysterious knob fills you with _determination_.

First, you figure that the white knob means cold and the orange one means hot.. But does that mean the biggest one turns the water on? And what was the mysterious purple knob for? All this thinking is giving you a headache… Shaking it off, you decide to actually try one of the knobs. Turning the orange one slightly causes a steady stream of water to trickle from the shower head. It is scalding, and you immediately let out a loud yelp, turning off the water. You decide to turn the white one, and are immediately hit with a stream of icy, cold water. Icy was the most appropriate word, this water was so cold you were honestly surprised that it wasn’t in sold form. The water is turned off again.

Shivering and burning all over, you glare at the wall and knobs. You probably don’t look too intimidating, you muse, standing naked and dripping wet with your hair in your eyes. Despite the fact that the water has done nothing to further your cleanliness alone, you decide that you are done. Screw this strange monster shower.

Whipping the curtain back to reclothe yourself, you are struck silent in shock. Your clothes are gone. Your guardian must’ve some to wash them when you were busy making a fool of yourself. Still.. You _did_ need to ask her how the shower worked, so this didn’t happen again. And… With a further search of the bathroom, there are no towels to cover up with.. _Curses._

After a good deal of consideration, you figure you can dash to your room and search for some clothes, since Toriel is busy cooking dinner. Opening the door softly and looking around, you take a few quick steps to reach your new bedroom. Shutting the door behind you so no one will walk in, you turn back to find some clothes.

There’s only one small problem…

_Toriel isn’t cooking._

She is busy picking out a sweater from the wardrobe _in your room_ , and turns at the sound of you closing the door. _Double curses._ You freeze, up against the door, your guardian’s face turning bright red. She laughs, albeit a bit awkwardly. “My child, you are done already? You sure are eager!” You shake your head, and explain your predicament, but not without a lot of stuttering. “I see..” She nods. “I will help, if you do not mind?” You look away for a moment, too flustered to meet her eyes, and nod slowly. “Very well. Let us be off then.”

Her voice is soft as she walks with you, and it helps ease your nerves, both of anxiety and embarrassment. Ushering you into the shower, she turns both knobs to reach a pleasantly warm temperature. You figure that the knobs are more suited to her hands anyways, but she may just be able to turn them so easily because she’s used to her house. You are suddenly brought from your distracted thoughts to reality as the furry monster steps in with you.

 _Wow._ You certainly didn’t expect this. Your face heats up in a blush so hot, you’d think your face was melting if you didn’t know any better. You’re too embarrassed to look back at her, so you settle for standing in the stream of warm water awkwardly. Toriel is smiling, and turns the purple knob a minute amount to the right. _Huh._ That knob sends out shampoo from a small pump that you didn’t notice. “My child, shall I wash your hair?” You finally turn to face her, and nod. “Alright then,” she smiles, happy. “Close your eyes, please.” As she disappears from view, your eyes shut, you feel her calmed hands massaging the shampoo into your scalp. It is so calming, and feelings _amazing_ , so much in fact, that you let out a soft exhale of happiness.

As the monster continues, you keep your eyes shut, letting out little hums as her claws gently skate across your head. It isn’t painful at all, rather feeling quite nice. You lean into her touch, and she giggles. “My, my, so eager!” This makes your face flare up again, but you’re too preoccupied by having her hands untangle your hair to back away, like you normally would. She hums softly, concentrated on getting your dull hair to shine. And by the time she was finished, your hair is unbelievably soft. The water has cleaned the grime and dirt from your skin, and Toriel lifts your head to wipe the last of it from your face. Satisfied with her work, she turns the water off.

She steps out, dipping her head. “Wait here, my child. I will fetch a towel.” You sit on the edge of the tub, hair dripping. Your guardian comes back with a huge towel that is very furry and think. You marvel at its size, it’s practically like a fuzzy comforter, and you can barely stand its weight. Toriel giggles, apologizing. “I am truly sorry, this is the smallest towel we have.” You nod in understanding, curling the towel around you until you’re stuck in it like a caterpillar it a cocoon. Toriel lives here alone, you figure, so it’d make sense that her towels are big and thick, to dry her furry body faster. The shampoo pump in the shower makes sense too, if you think about it. Hair-covered monsters like her would certainly need a lot more shampoo than humans.

She herds you off to your room, fetching your clothes. They are fresh and clean, warm like the water, but dry, and honestly, they make you kind of drowsy. You let her dress you, and sit on her lap as she pulls on your freshly heated hoodie. Leaning against her in a sudden bout of tiredness, you notice a singed spot on your sleeve. Questioning it, Toriel replies to you, embarrassed, that she used her fire magic to dry your clothes. You would ask her about how magic works, but your eyes close before you can and suddenly you’re asleep on her lap, breathing softly.


	4. Dinnertime

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> vegetoid says eat ur greens

Toriel lets you sleep in her lap for a few minutes, her chest rumbling as she laughs. Then, with a short rustle of a hand patting your shoulder, she speaks. “My child, you should get up. Dinner is waiting. You are hungry, are you not?” Not wanting to get up at first, you snuggle into her chest, the soft towel she wears like a pillow case over her fur. “Besides,” the monster laughs again. “Don’t you think I should get dressed?”

You grudgingly agree, but only because you really _do_ think she should get dressed. Realizing that you feel asleep on your practically naked crush does _quite_ the thing for embarrassment… You’re dressed, though, and that’s better than it could be. Scrambling off of Toriel and onto the bed, you tell her to go get dressed. She nods, thanking you and walking out of the room. You notice, as she leaves, that they towel that was huge and superfluous on you fits her just right.

Almost a little _too_  right really. It hugs her curves and makes her appear furrier than she really is. You admire her as she walks out, eyes on the swing of her hips and she walks make the towel swish back and forth. Her shoulder blades aren’t well defined because of her body type, but you can see where they are, and marvel at them. How can a monster be this beautiful? Why was she called a monster? She didn’t deserve that name. She was.. She was an angel, practically, and anyone that called her a beast or otherwise were the real monsters.

Sitting on the bed and waiting patiently for her to get dressed, you fiddle around with your lamp, listening to the soft, tinkly music peter out whenever you turn it off. You’re wrapped up in its calm melody, almost about to fall asleep once more, until your hear Toriel’s door creak open. You jump up, excited, and come to meet her in the hallway. She laughs, wrapping you up in a big hug. You marvel at how the shampoo makes her fur smell like lavender, one of your favorite smells. Leading you to the table, she tells you to wait for a moment while she brings out the food.

When it arrives, the food looks absolutely _delicious_. And you haven’t even tasted it yet! You’ve always been a sucker for salad, and this kind looks lovely. It’s like… Like your mom always made…

Your face turns somber and this melody, and your guardian is worried. “My child, is there something wrong?” Her eyes, usually a dark, muted maroon, are shining with surprise and a hint of fear. “Is something not to your liking?” Her careful voice brings you from your memories, dragging you out like an archaeologist using their brush to unearth old bones. Old, covered bones.. Like your memories. You’re sent back under again, into the flood. You loved your mom, you really did, and you just left her… She must be so worried now..

Tears drip down your cheeks slowly, and you don’t move or make a sound, just staring at the greens in front of you. Toriel gulps, uncomfortable. She brings your head up with a clawed finger, staring into your eyes. “My child..” Her voice wavers, and her brows are quirked in uncertainty. “Is everything alright?”

You nod, wiping at your face. You know you can’t speak at the moment, for your voice would crack and you would erupt into all-out sobbing. So you wipe at your eyes and face, and eventually the tears stopping coming. Clearing your throat, quite a few times, as it is choked up with longing and sorrow, you speak. “I… I’m fine.” You gulp. “I just.. I miss my mom…” You did. You really missed her.. Even though you jumped down here on _purpose_. But you weren’t dead yet, were you?

_Was this place heaven?_

_Was Toriel an angel?_

You hear the scrape of a chair against the wooden floorboards as soft arms are wrapped around you, so comforting you that you are at a loss for words. Sweet nothings are being whispered into your ears and you _do_ start crying again because you are okay. You are _okay_ and Toriel is _here_ and she is your new mom even through you may have a bit of a crush on here and that may make things complicated but whatever happens, _it is okay. Everything is perfectly fine._

Toriel, done comforting you, pats your back softly. “My, my, you sure are quick to cry, are you not, my child?” She laughs, trying to make light of the situation. You nod, asking if you should get back to dinner. After all, your salad isn’t _too_ soaked with tears by now, is it?

Dinner is finished relatively quickly, and you have pie for dessert. Turns out this delicacy was the source of the delicious scent wafting throughout the whole house. And _boy_ did the pie put the scent to shame! It was a wonderful, creamy combination of cinnamon and butterscotch, two amazing sweets wrapped up into a single little slice of pie just _bursting_ with flavor. You muse over asking her if she can teach you how to make it, but decide against it. That’s a question for later, as now you _are_ tired. The salad has made you full, and having the pie to top if off makes you quite drowsy.

Toriel notices your sleepiness, and gently herds you off to your room, saying that it is bedtime at last, that you have had a long day. And you really _have_. You think over the events, and how the day hadn’t gone as planned out at all. You were just supposed to fall down the hole and die a quick, albeit painful death, but instead you were tormented by a talking flower, saved by a beautiful ‘monster,’ and treated to dinner and a shower with her. In all honesty, you wouldn’t have liked the events any other way.

You ask if she has some pajamas, and she nods, running off to get some. The white monster returns with two pairs, one a striped pair of footie pajamas, the other a button-up fleece pair dotted with little golden flowers. You pick the flowered ones, marveling at how comfortable they are once you have them on. They’re rather big on you, but you suppose that they aren’t meant for a child, but rather someone of Toriel’s stature. But that doesn’t matter, because you’re almost dozing off anyways.

The last thing you remember before finally slipping into sleep’s gentle confines is your guardian reading you a bedtime story, something about a fluffy bunny.


	5. Digging up Old Memories

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> UNEXPECTED ANGST (i had meant for this chapter to be something cute where the reader explores the ruins and meets the other monsters that live there but here we are with feels)

When you next awaken, you have vague memories of a rabbit in your mind. These thoughts are vague and detached, floating off in your subconscious. _Rabbit..? Why would you be thinking about rabbits? You hadn’t seen any since you lived aboveground.._ Yet.. Here you were.

Shaking the fog from your mind, you get up and wrestle yourself into another small sweater, this one pink with a maroon stripe across the chest. Something sizzling sounds from the kitchen, and you head over, rubbing the sleep from your eyes.

Toriel is in a light purple bathrobe, her fur damp and shampoo-scented. You walked up, asking her if there are any rabbits in the Underground. She seems reluctant to talk at first, then starts to say that no, there are no rabbits in the Ruins. “My child..  Why are you asking me about rabbits, all of a sudden?” Her ears flop down as she tilts her head to the side in curiosity. You stumble over your words, not sure how to explain the random appearance of these bunny-filled thoughts. “Ahh… Um..” You shrug, and before you can say anything else, she interjects, apologizing for doing so before speaking. “Oh! I am sorry to interrupt, but perhaps it was the story?”

 _Story?_ Your face screwed up in confusion, before relaxing, as you realize... _The bedtime story._ That was the source of the mysterious memories! Which..weren’t even memories, really. You’d always had vivid dreams, especially when off your meds.. So real, they _seemed_ , that it took forever to find out that they _weren’t_ real. Speaking of being off your meds, you hadn’t take them for a long while now, even before you’d decide to make the big jump down here. Of course, it wasn’t a big deal, it just meant you had weird dreams and got more anxious than usual. _That would explain the crying_ , you muse to yourself.

You nod in return to Toriel’s question, peeking around her to see what she’s cooking up for breakfast. It seems to be an omelette of some sort, and it smells _wonderful_. You’d always been partial to the cooked eggs, so as she laughs at your eagerness, you chuckle too, explaining yourself. The white monster grins in response. “I had thought of making a snail dish,” she folds the edge of the omelette over with a dainty pick of her clawed fingers. “But I have learned humans don’t like those much..” She chuckles, maroon eyes far away in a distant memory. You hate to interrupt her daydreaming, but your curiosity pushes you onwards.

You ask her if there are other humans living in the Ruins, voice quiet. This seems to be another sore spot for Toriel, as sadness comes across her features. The omelette begins to burn as she is swept away in her thoughts, and only the sole of smoke saves her from their relentless tide. Picking up the omelette with her bare hands(you begin to wonder how on earth she hasn’t burned herself, but then realize she uses fire magic, so she must be immune to the heat), your guardian answers you in a simple, stiff word. “ _No._ ”

This sudden bout of seriousness has you intimidated and slightly scared, since the first time you’ve fallen down. Well, that wouldn’t be counting Flowey, but honestly, who _wouldn’t_ be frightened when a talking flower, something the likes of which they’d never before seen, tried to make an attempt on their life? Toriel does not say anything more, turning back stiffly to crack another egg into the pan. You twist your hands into the hem of your sweater, and however childish a gesture you know it to appear, it is mildly comforting.

You watch the white monster prepare breakfast for about another minute or so, before trying to broach the subject a little further. Your voice is soft and careful, but Toriel cuts you off immediately. “My child,” she sounds strained, pointedly keeping her gaze on the egg and not on you. “I would not like to talk about this at the moment.” She sends out a little burst of flame from her hands to start cooking her breakfast, the fire licking at the pan’s underside hungrily, so energetic, unlike the beast that had summoned it.

Breakfast, as it comes by eventually, happens in a stiff silence. It hangs over the two of you in a heavy, awkward cloud, occasionally punctuated by the sounds of chewing. Curiosity still fills your being, bubbling up to your very brim. But alas, you cannot ask anything, partly in fear that Toriel will shut you off yet again, and partly that you don’t want to be rude and ask her something while she is chewing her food. You almost think she is eating so much _because_ it gives her an excuse not to speak.. Would she be above that?

It seems she wouldn’t, because as you watch further, it seems to be _exactly_ what she _is_ doing.. You open your mouth to ask a question, but not even one syllable passes your lips before she shoves another piece of egg in her mouth, fangs tearing at it as if to make a point. You wonder _what on earth_ is going on, how your cheerful guardian has turned into someone so strict and harsh all of a sudden.. A worthy comparison would be that of a comfy blanket turning into a pile of sharp edged bricks, something sweet and comforting morphing into an edged, immoveable object. Heck, speaking at this moment was like talking to a brick wall, so that only proved the simile further.

You play around with the butterknife next to your plate, running a finger across the dull edge in pure boredom. Toriel notes this with a flash of.. _Fear..?_..in her dark eyes. She takes the knife from you, clearing her throat awkwardly. “My child..” She speaks, holding the knife close to herself, and thus out of your reach. “…Knives are dangerous, why don’t you go play with the toys in your room..?” The white monster before you looks scared, eyes flickering akin to the way they had when she was lost in thought before. _Was she having flashbacks again..?_

You decided not to ask, telling yourself sternly that if there is anything she wants to tell you, she _will_. No use in making her uncomfortable by asking too many questions.. If she gives you space, you can give her space… So you set your dishes on the kitchen counter by the sink, noting white fur stuck in the drain. She must’ve worked hard on breakfast that morning… You feel bad for dampening what should have been a happy morning, and walk off to your room.

One last glance provides a view of Toriel staring off into the distance, not even bothering to eat anymore. Tearing your eyes from this melancholy scene, you trudge off, shutting the bedroom door. It, like the emotional barrier she has set up against your prying questions, it yet another wall between the two of you.

You only hope that you can repair the damage you’ve done before it is too late.. You miss Toriel being happy, and the tears you saw spotting the edges of her eyes certainly do not suit her.


	6. The Fallen Child

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This turned out way more depressing than I planned, warnings for potentially triggering stuff in tags

Once in your bedroom, you sit down. Not on the bed, but on the floor, leaning against it. Eyes closed and brows furrowed, you wondered what you did to upset your guardian so much. The perpetual music that plays throughout the house does little to lighten your mood or calm your nerves. Yet, you listen anyways, bobbing your head slightly to the beat as you tap your foot against the wooden floor.

Running through Toriel’s words in your mind, you are mystified.

_Why is she so reluctant to talk about who lives in the Ruins? It mustn’t be the Ruins that trouble her so, or she wouldn’t be giving here… Perhaps it is the inhabitants? And why had she turned stone cold when you brought up humans? Had she ever met any..?_

_And… For that matter, why had she been so scared when you picked up the knife? It had been set out for you to use on your omelette, had it not? Did she think you were going to stab her or something?_

These thoughts plague you endlessly, and you shake your head in a futile effort to ward them out, to get them _out_. Deciding finally that your only option is to distract yourself, you crawl over to the toy chest.

Undoing the latch easily, you push your hoodie from the top of it and onto your bed. Rummaging through it coats your hands in a think, grey-white substance. Taking the aforementioned appendages out, you grimace.

 _Dust_.

Why are these toys so dusty? Have they really not been used in _so_ long? Brushing your hands on your sweater, you let out a sigh as the pink fabric is marred with grey lines. _Great, you just can’t keep yourself from ruining all the clothes you can get your hands on down here, can you?_ You mentally chastise yourself.

Putting aside your initial disgust, you pull a toy from the box. It is a stuffed bear, or appears to have been at one point. It is ratty, as if it had carried around and loved far too much. Although, ‘loved’ seems to be a relative term, because the face has been slashed away in an obviously deliberate may.

_A large smile has been hacked through the fur on its face, turning it into some kind of demented Care Bear-esque toy._

Deeply unnerved, you push it off to the side, gulping back the bile that rises in your throat. That bear put you more on edge than it should have, almost as if it was harboring some kind of evil spirit.

You reach out the pull another toy from the chest before hearing a clear voice. It is the voice of a child, sounding no more than eight years old at most. The lack of growing in its tone makes it sounds far more human than you are used to, only having heard Toriel and Flowey’s voices since you’d fallen down. Yet, however small it is, it shoots down to the very depths of your being, curdling them in fear.

**Stop touching my toys.**

You whirl around, letting out a gasp. But there is no one there, or anywhere in sight. You’re so scared you want to puke, and you actually gag on the air that you quickly suck in, having lost your breath to pure shock. Dry heaving for a moment, you cough it out and curl up on the floor when you’re sure that the sudden sick feeling is gone.

The fear stays, however, and you start breathing hard. _What_ was _that?!! Where did it come from? Who was it? Where are they now? Were they human? Monster? Do they live here? Was Toriel hiding them from you? Is this why Toriel got so upset? Does she not like them?_

Question after question appears, the lot of them pummeling your brain into submission. You’re so confused and scared, it should hardly be surprising that you start to cry. The tears dripping down your cheeks mingle with the dust you’ve gotten all over the floorboard.

Feeling the urge to cuddle something, to hold something, to truly _feel_ something to link you to the physical world so you don’t get swept away in the flood of fear, you scrabble about. Anything will do, you figure, until you outstretch hands encloses around the dull brown ear of the scarred bear. Realized what’ve you’ve done, you shove it away in panic.

Breathing hard, you curl in on yourself further, breaking out into full-on sobbing. _Why can’t anything go right? Why do you keep making such a mess of yourself? You.._ A sudden thought surfaces, and takes hold, leeching all your attention and holding you captive. _You were right to jump down here, but you should have died. That flower should have killed you, you full-on deserved it. You don’t deserve Toriel. She shouldn’t have saved you. If she had come in one moment later, you never would have met. You wouldn’t have caused her such inconvenience, or brought up such obviously painful memories._ You wish that had happened.

**How pitiful.**

The mysterious voice speaks again, in such a superior, demeaning, _mocking_ tone. You almost _nod_ in agreement, the only thing holding you back being the fact that you’re frozen still with fear. However young this voice sounds, it holds such power over you. And whoever is speaking _knows_ that, using it to their advantage. This fact caused you to cry even harder.

 _You’re submitting yourself to a_ ** _child_** _, for goodness sake!_ _Being so weak as to meekly lie down, belly-up against this voice, it’s disgusting. How did you ever get here? When did the apathy, the depression start sinking in? When did you stop caring? When, as you finally did care, did you only feel fear, anxiety, instead?_

You curl up against yourself even further, if possible. You just want the voice to stop, to stop eliciting such awful, terror-filled reactions. You want the questions to stop, you need something to distract yourself from this endless whirlpool you’ve fallen prey to.

_And that is how Toriel later enters the room with a slice of pie(a means of peace treaty and/or forgiveness), only to drop it as she sees you scratching at your already bleeding arms furiously, not even bothering to hide yourself._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> BUT HEY YOU GUYS GOT A NEW CHAPTER AND A NEW STORY IN ONE DAY HOW LUCKY YOU ARE!!!! because I'm still sick


	7. Reconciliation

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> yo it probably add to the vibe I'm going for if you listen to the track memory while reading this chapter just a suggestion

You’d gone into overdrive, you’d needed something to keep yourself awake, _aware_. To keep yourself grounded, really. And so, in an effort to ward off the panic that had settled all too easily into your bones, creeping in and freezing them like ice.. You’d gone to pain.

Of course, while scratching your skin off was nowhere near as wounding or detrimental as just sticking a blade in your arm(a classic effort to off yourself, you couldn’t deny), it still hurt. Besides, cutting had never been as appealing, and the mere thought of even slicing your fragile epidermis away with a knife on _accident_ filled you with more fear than reasonable. So scraping it was.

You were calmed down quite a bit, actually. The sharp, yet gradual pain cut through the fog of fear and confusion that had taken its hold. You had begun to lean up against the bed, such as to get a better angle. Biting your lip and risking yet another dig of your fingernails into already pink skin, the door opens.

That alone would usually not rouse your from your self-destructive habits, but the breaking of glass follows soon after, accompanied with a gasp. You look up, surprised and more than a little startled. Your gaze slowly wanders up, as if in denial to who is it.

 _Toriel_. Her hands are over her mouth, stifling any further noise, and she seems to be frozen in place by emotions you can’t quite place. Scared, yes, but…

For you?

Or _of you_?

The room is filled with uncomfortable silence, and neither of you move for fear of scaring the other. Goosebumps prickle up, raising the hairs on your arms and sides. You open your mouth, to make an excuse, to comfort Toriel, to apologize, to do _something_ to break this still moment.

In that exact time, she takes a small steps forward, several more following soon after. The white monster’s arms suddenly surround you, her face is mere inches from yours, snout just barely touching your nose. Her soft hands on on your cheeks, careful, lightly touching them so her nails don’t damage your skin any further than you’ve used your own to do.

It is a while, in reality only seconds, but seeming _eternities_ before she speaks. Her dark eyes are having trouble focusing on you, as if she is thinking of something else, some _where_ else.

Some _one_ else?

Your can’t meet Toriel’s gaze anymore, even knowing that she is only interested in your wellbeing. It is too worried, too _prying_ , reminding you of past experiences.

Psychiatrists..

Therapists..

Doctors..

Teachers..

Even your own mother, your _real_ mother.

They’ve all given you this look, like you’re some shy animal that could lash out at any wrong touch. Like you’re this wary, unknown species that they’re going to dissect, pull _apart_ , just to figure out what is _wrong_ with you.

“ _…..Chara…_ ” Her voice is a whisper, hoarse with disbelief.

And then, like nothing happened, the monster snaps out of it, patting your shoulders, face calming. “My child,” She uses your actual name this time, shaking her head as if calling you by this other, mysterious word was just some silly mistake. Yet, you saw, deep in her maroon eyes, that it is _more_ than the goofy blunder of a little old lady. “Let’s get you cleaned up.”

Her hands are soft as she washes your arm, leaving you at the dining room table to go fetch something. It is another slice of pie, and when you politely decline, she shakes her head. A little stubbornly, she nudges you onwards to eating it. You roll your eyes a little, playfully. Her calmness, her motherly tendencies.. They are beginning to calm you down, and ease the tension in you muscles.

Finally taking a bite of the pie, you marvel as your body is filled with a progressive warmth, the scratches on your arm glowing softly. Lifting you arm to get a closer look, the heat fades and there is nothing to see. Even the older scars on your arm are gone, and your skin looks practically brand new.

You’re speechless, but Toriel fills the empty space with words for you. “You see.. Monster food.. It has healing abilities. I do not know how it does this, but I have used it before. It is very handy, is it not?” You tilt your head n curiosity(she doesn’t seem the type to get into much trouble, what use would she have had for healing?), and she sighs, smile ghosting her lips. “I suppose you are due for an explanation..”

Patting you arm, she gestures for you to get up and follow her. Pulling a book from the shelf beside the softly crackling fireplace, Toriel sits in the soft armchair. You stand awkwardly by, until she politely requests that you sit in her lap. Spreading the pages of the book across both your laps, it is revealed to be a photo album. The photos inside are colored in tones of sepia, the soft browns settled calmly within the plastic sleeves of the book.

She flips through the different pages, a little quickly for your tastes. _Was she in a rush because she didn’t want you seeing certain pictures?_ You shrug it off, figuring that you shouldn’t push it. You’re getting an explanation that she’s _willing_ to give, Toriel will show you what she wants. The pages finally still at a picture of a small monster that looks sort of like Toriel, but Toriel herself seems to be in the background, with someone else. The photo is focused on the small monster, who is standing next to…. _A human..?_

“Are you done looking at the photo..?” Your guardian’s voice is soft, careful. You shake your head, but look to her for answers on the subject of the photo. She chuckles, shaking her head, but goes on nonetheless. “These are.. _Were_..” Her voice is pointed, but not hostile. It sounds as though she is trying to convince herself of something. “..My children.. Chara,” she points to the human and monster respectively. “And Asriel.” The white monster pauses so you can intake this new information. You are surprised, and search her face for any signs of age. She doesn’t look _that_ old. Noting your surprise, she chuckles, knowing exactly what you are thinking. “Don’t flatter me, young one. Monsters such as I.. We do not age until we have children who our power can then flow through..”

You shyly ask what her kids were like, pushing back further puzzlement(like, how can a monster have human kids?) in your mind. She tells you haw Asriel was kind, and a little shy, but her voice takes a different tone when she speaks of the other. “Chara… They were a puzzling child.. You remind me of them, a little. I am not sure why.” Toriel pauses to ruffle your hair before continuing. “They feel down,” Your question is answered. _Huh, you really aren’t that different._ “…like you. They were… Troublesome, always getting themselves hurt… Sometimes on purpose.” She looks a little sad, and you pat her hand in an effort to be comforting. It’s the least you can do.

“Chara and Asriel… They are not here anymore.. They tried to break the barrier.. That is what holds us monsters underground, by the way.” You ask if humans can go through, and she confirms that yes, any human can do from aboveground to below, but not back up. You ask if there is any way to get out, and your guardian seems even sadder as she hears this. “I…” Her voice hardens again, and you tense up. “No.” Toriel softens again, turning you on her lap so that you are face to face.

“Are you not happy here?”

You struggle for a verbal answer, shaking your head vigorously. There is no way to tell her how thankful you are for all she’s done, how lovely, how kind, how sweet she is! It al stumbles out in a matter of words, small but strong in meaning.

“Toriel… I _love_ you.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm nice, so I decided to update again without making you wait a week ^w^ Also, I'm feeling a lot better, and am getting more and more inspired! Summer is giving me more and more time to write, I hope I can give you more frequent updates like this!


	8. Walk it Out

The white monster's brow raised, and she blushed, surprised. "My child..." Her voice and gaze softened. "I love you too, don't you know that? I am glad you would not leave. Er.." Toriel looked a bit awkward for a moment. "That is what you meant, is it not?" You look up at her, holding back a frown. Yes, you wouldn't leave her.. but she just _isn't_ getting what you mean! You _love_ her! Like, love _love_ her!

You merely nod in response, mustering up an innocent smile. Legitimate confessions would have to wait, it seemed. Now wasn't the time, anyhow. The misinterpreted words had slipped past your lips on pure accident, you convinced yourself. The confession _could_ have gone a lot worse, you should be thanking your lucky stars it hadn't.

Anyhow, if you really were desperate for Toriel's romantic affection, you could always try flirting.

Keyword being _could._ You honestly doubted you'd ever be able to pull it off, what with your stuttering tone and word-stumbling. Even if you _did_ get anything out smoothly, it would most likely still be mistaken for something else, or worse, thrown off as the ramblings of a child.

You weren't a child.

Not that you didn't mind being treated like one! But still, you just.. _ached_ for something _more_ from you and your guardian's interactions. Despite her almost constant attention and worrying, the barrier she put up to play you off as a little kid.. It _bothered_ you.

In all honesty, you were getting a bit lonely.

The white monster had stayed quiet throughout your thinking, but interjects when you actually _do_ lose your façade of being happy. "My child, are you alright?" You nod quickly, coming up with a quick excuse of still being a little hungry. Tories begins to look a little guilty, looking away from you. "I am quite sorry about this morning's events... I should not have acted in such an unruly manner.. Banishing you to your room.. Of course a child needs freedom, and food as well."

You shrug it off, casually forgiving her. She chuckles, maroon eyes meeting yours. "I am simply a little old lady who worries too much, hmm?" You consider asking her age, but that would be rude and a little embarrassing. So, laughing along with her, you ask if there is anything planned for the rest of the day.

The word ‘freedom’ had caught your eye(or ear, rather?), perhaps you could explore the underground?

She seems to catch on, gesturing for you to get up and off of her lap with a wave of a clawed hand. “Perhaps I shall show you around outside.” You jump off, and Toriel rises slowly, stifling a smile at your eagerness. “Come,” she walks, furred feet shuffling against the floorboards. “Let me guide you through the catacombs.”

You follow quickly, making a quick detour to run off and grab your ratty shoes.

You step outside slowly, marveling at the calm purple light that seems to wash over everything. It has no source, but it is everywhere. If you had to guess, you’d say it was emanating from the walls themselves.

Turning back to examine your new home(you hadn’t gotten a good look earlier, too overcome by fatigue), you smile softly. Such a tiny, tidy house surrounded by ruins… You’re filled with _love_. Toriel must work very hard to keep it looking so nice, as the house is a far cry from the surrounding walls of the clearing, which are unkept and crumbling.

Red leaves crunch underfoot as your guardian begins padding down a well beaten trail, lavender in color. “My child,” she sounds excited, thrilled to guide you. “I hope you enjoy the trails as well as you do our home.” You nod in assurance, feeling pretty confident that you’ll have fun.

There is a tall tree a little ways away from the house, and you wonder how it could _possibly_ grow without sunlight. Then again, you muse, it _is_ in the world of monsters, and has probably adapted. It is barren, so perhaps it is dead? It’s base is surrounded in crinkly red leaves that don’t seem to be _too_ old, so you’d assume not.

Toriel guides you around it, noting your gaze. “Perhaps I shall tell you about the plants of the Ruins sometime.” You nod happily, curious. While not being a stereotypical ‘girly-girl,’ you still had a fond appreciation for flowers and other plants. They were nice to look at.

More red leaves greet you as the path branches in two. You look around, but your companion guides you to the right, saying that there is nothing much to see at left. You could’ve sworn you’d heard the croaking of a frog and perhaps a tiny meow(?), your brows contorting in confusion. The white monster leading you chuckle, offering a furry hand. “I don’t want you to get lost, please follow me closely.”

You blush a little and take it, pondering just how _close_ Toriel would mind you being. The flirting stays confined to your mind however, as you are much too shy to say such a thing aloud.

Her hand is soft, Toriel being cautious not the scratch you with her claws. The nails seem filed down anyhow, but it seems your guardian is taking every available chance to make you feel as comfortable as possible.

The next room you enter has three columns and multicolored buttons that arise from the ground. You walk over to one, tugging Toriel’s arm in the process(not that she seems to mind, she only giggles at your enthusiasm), and press it slowly. You wait with bated breath for something special to happen…. But nothing happens.

 _Well, that was anti-climactic._ You shrug it off, questioning the purpose of the buttons. The white monster accompanying you smiles in understanding, explaining that you must press a certain button. You ask what will happen then, but she says it is a surprise.

You press another button, this one green. With a soft click, you marvel as spikes across the room catch your eye. They are lowered into the ground, under shiny metal plates. It is a little strange, seeing what seems to be such a modern system in this dusty place. You ask Toriel about it, but she tells you that she put in the puzzles herself, at the suggestion of a friend.

She tells you that there are many more, and that you should work to traverse the the next room, and the many that follow after.

Heck, you were never one for puzzle solving, but if it made her happy?

You were _ready_.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I actually used a map of the Ruins for this chapter, praise me.
> 
> Also, I have a little headcanon that Toriel set up the puzzles in the Ruins after chatting with Sans and Papyrus(she usually chats with Sans, but one day he brought Pap along, and OF COURSE the tol skel was distraught when she told him about the the lack of puzzles). I'm thinking of writing a little drabble about that, would you guys like that?
> 
> Also! More Undertale stories I'm writing, if you care to check them out(when I'm finished and post them, of course):
> 
> Buttercups- My take on why Chara used the buttercups, both testing them on Asgore and killing themselves, and their motivation to do so
> 
> Smells Like Angry Fish- Undyne has no chill, Alphys makes her take a bath to get some
> 
> I'm thinking of continuing Home Again, my Flowiel story, but I've been unmotivated... Do you guys wanna see the end of it, or no?


	9. Laughter is the Best Medicine

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> warning for bad puns yo

You step through the doorway carefully, even though the spikes that once stood there are long gone. When you get to the next room, it looks… _Exactly the same?_ Your brows furrow in confusion, but Toriel gestures for you to go onwards with a white hand.

Venturing in further reveals a metal plaque on one wall, and you had to wipe away some grime to read what it says.

_If you can read this, press the red switch_.

You walk over to the button in question, finding it to the left of the last column. Once again, the spikes that bar you from entering the next door disappear. You go into the next room, and sigh. The very same. _Again._

You ask Toriel how long this goes on for, and she chuckles softly. “Not long, dear. I assure you, there are plenty more different ones.” You smile weakly, not sure if by ‘not long’ she means just a few more, or a _lot_ more.. You only hope for the former, not the latter as you’ve found you don’t have a very long attention span.

Going into the next room, you glance at the wall plaque, and it explains the similarity between the rooms- which are actually the _same_ room. _Huh._

_The far door is not an exit, it simply marks a rotation in perspective_.

You nod, noting that it points towards the doorway you came through, not the one you’re about to traverse. This means you are done with the puzzle. Toriel claps her hands together, proud. “You have enjoyed it, have you not?” She is smiling, struggling not to let it blossom into a full-on grin.

Her joy is contagious, you soon find yourself beaming as well. You tell her that, yes, you actually did find it fun. It was very creative, having it rotate in such a way. Your guardian seems pleased with your response, and ushers you onto the next puzzle.

The path in the following room seems to have disappeared, and darker spots dapple the ground. You walk over one, glancing at the vines the mark the walls. However, you have little time to admire their green leaves before you find yourself falling _through_ the ground.

Surprisingly, when you hit the ground, you are not hurt. Glancing around and wait for the sudden shock of plummeting to disappear, you see that you are surrounded by a mile of red leaves. You lie on your back amidst them for a moment, breathing hard.

Toriel’s voice calls out for you, worried. “My child? Are you alright?” She frets, and you hear her claws scrabble on the ground above you as she begins to pace. “Oh, I _knew_ I shouldn’t had introduced them to this puzzle just yet..”

You feel bad for her, but you’d gotten the wind knocked out of you by falling, so you were in no condition to speak, much less yell. After a moment more of huffing and puffing, you look around in the small room you’d dropped in. Nothing much to see, except a small doorway which seems to be your exit. You step through it, and find yourself at the beginning of the room.

The white monster who’d accompanied you runs towards you, checking to make sure that you are okay. “Oh my, I’m so sorry, I-” You laugh, patting her shoulder with a shaky hand. You tell her softly that you’re quite alright, just a little _winded_ from having your wind knocked out.

Her eyes turn bright, and she bursts out laughing. You giggle at how funny she finds it, telling her that it was a pretty lame joke. The white monster shakes her head, catching her breath from how hard she’d been laughing. You’d think the woman hadn’t heard a joke in a million years from her reaction, but at least she was smiling again.

As you walk throughout the ruins, solving puzzles as you go, you begin to bond over your love of bad jokes. Of course, you prefer being on the giving end with puns rather than receiving, loving people’s reaction to how bad your jokes can get. She’s never heard any of the jokes you spout, and some she doesn’t even understand.

You tell her a joke about two fish sitting in a tank. One turns to the other, and says, “Hey, how do you drive this thing?” She cocks her head in confusion, and you stumble around for another one. You ask her why coffee tastes like mud. Toriel taps her chin idly, deep in thought. “Why does it taste like mud, my child?” You shake your head at her formal response, holding back a grin. However, the smile breaks across your face as you tell her the punchline, because the coffee was only _ground_ a few minutes ago.

Her reaction is similar to the first, if not _more_ amused. The furry monster slumps against the wall in a fit of giggles, nodding as you jokingly ask if she is okay. Once she has regained her composure, Toriel shoots you a smirk.

Grin wide on her furry mug, she asks why the skeleton didn’t go to the dance. You roll your eyes playfully, having heard this a million times. Still, you indulge her, and ask why. “Because he had no _body_ to go with!” She leans down to your height, grinning in anticipation of your reaction.You blush a little from how close she is, but end up chuckling all the same.

The next room has a duller floor, akin to the room in which you’d called down. You tense up, not wanting to go through that ordeal, and glance back at Toriel. Her eyes widen in realization, and she apologizes for being so inconsiderate. Before you can even respond, you are being lifted in her arms and carried across the room.

If anything, you face has turned a shade redder from the physical contact. You mentally scold yourself, shaking your head. _Get your mind out of the gutter, dummy._ She sets you down lightly, and you hold her hand, a little dizzy. Once you can see straight again, you ask how she got through without falling.

The white monster begins to respond normally, but cuts herself off, and starts up on what you _know_ is going to be an awful joke. Still, you can’t help chuckling at what she says, getting through the explanation that you’d ventured through yet another puzzle.

“It was rather _puzzling_ , was it not?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> yo back with another update my chums.. i've been learning german so thats boggin me down a bit but i still have tons a free time so no worries


	10. Meet the Monsters

You and Toriel walked through the ruins at an idle pace, cracking jokes all the way. You’d just finished the second rock puzzle, relieved that it isn’t as hard as the first one. It seems that you’re going through all the puzzles backwards, starting from hard and gradually getting to the easier ones.

The first rock puzzle was simple enough in theory, of course. Rocks just sat around and did nothing, didn’t they? You push back an inward laugh at your own naivety. This was a world of monsters, you shouldn’t have been so shocked when one of the rocks spoke to you.

Of course, it moved into place where you needed it to go, but only after a long conversation in which your impatience made it hard to be polite. And just when you were going to exit that room, that rock just scooted off the plate, allowing the spikes to jump right back up! You could’ve died, or at least, have been mortally wounded.

These _were_ monsters however, you should keep the name in mind. Of course, your guardian _was_ one as well, but she was the only one you’d met so far who _hadn’t_ been deserving of the general title. You shudder at the thought of the flower who’d ‘greeted you’ when you’d first begun to explore the mysterious world you’d jumped into. It _was_ more than worthy of being called a monster, a beast, anything of the like.

In the next room you wander into, there is the soft sound of sniffling from the side of the path. Walking in slowly, you are greeted to the sight of a small, moth-like monster. Before you come any closer, Toriel stops you. Gesturing to the tiny creature, she begins speaking softly, so as to not scare it off.

“You may have already known, but the Underground is _full_ of monsters. Please, instead of fighting, try to be kind. Strike up a friendly conversation, will you not?” She gives you a hopeful look, smiling. You nod, filled with _love_ at your mother’s concern for the other inhabitants of the Ruins.

Tiptoeing forward, a voice speaks out in your head.

**Whimsun approaches meekly!**

It is the same one you have heard back in your bedroom, but it sounds more excited this time. Still, you keep up your guard. This voice, whoever it belongs to, has always filled you with a sense of _bad_ news.

As you reach down to console the monster, it avoids eyes contact, muttering apologies. Halfway through your first word, it bursts into tears and runs away. You’re disappointed in yourself for scaring it off and interfering with what must be some personal issues, but at least now that it’s gone, the presence in your head has disappeared as well.

Venturing further down the path, as the room _is_ pretty big, you spot another monster. This one… Is peculiar, to say the least. It isn’t ugly, it’s just out of the ordinary. Heck, if you think about it, it’s actually pretty cute. It looks sort of like a frog, but it has a face absurd by shadows on its stomach.

Walking up to it happily, you hold back a groan as the voice intrudes on your thoughts again. However, you don’t let it bother you, reminding yourself that is _is_ only a voice, and it can’t do anything to hurt you.

**Froggit attacks you!**

It hops to and fro, managing to knock you over. _Ow._ The ground is hard, and it _hurts_.

**You are intimidated by Froggit’s raw strength.**

You don’t think this creature means harm, it reminds you more of an overeager puppy who doesn’t know that it’s hurting you. However, it _was_ pretty strong.

Toriel walks closer, shooting a glare at the little monster. This look is one of fierce protection, and while you are sorry that the Froggit had to be scared off by your guardian, you _are_ glad that she cares enough to save you from getting hurt any more.

You chuckle, trying to convince her that it’s okay. The white monster begins to calm down, but shoots an annoyed look in the direction in which the creature hopped off in. “I only wish it’d had the decency to apologize..” You pat her arm, jokingly asking why she is turning so strict when only minutes ago she’d told you to play nicely with the other monsters. She begins thinking this through, shaking her head when she realizes your logical question. Laughing it off, Toriel pats your arm.

“You are a very smart child, you must have done well in school.” You giggle nervously, choosing not to bog down the moment with the harsh reality of your grades. She continues, gazing somewhere off into the distance wistfully. “You know..” Toriel chuckles. “I’d always wanted to become a teacher.. I have many curriculum books at home even, from my kids’ learning..”

She is smiling softly, lost in a good memory. You watch her, stuck in the moment for a little while. Your guardian is the one who breaks the silence first. “I.. I ought to get more, now that you’ll be living with me..” You begin to tell her, no, it can wait.. But she shakes her head, hastily handing you a cell phone. “Here, take this.” Toriel begins to explain how it works, and you listen, unable to get a word in edgewise. “I will go buy more books, human-suited ones.”

She hurries off, the only evidence of her presence being claw marks in the dirt. You glance at the phone for a moment, before shoving it in your pocket. It made you kinda nervous, you worried that you might drop it. It was pretty bulky, heavy with the weight of an older phone. A _waaay_ older phone. You’d navigate its no doubt weird menus later, the spirit of adventure was calling you.

Figuring that it’d be easier to head back home instead wandering further, you turn around. However, another path, a third exit from the room catches your eye. You figure you’ll take a quick peek, and wander on in.

Inside the room, two soft streams burble on by, the opposite walls covered in vines. The room itself is very small, the centerpiece being a pedestal with a big bowl on it. Red leaves dust the floor around the base, and you glance in to spot a plethora of candies.

Taking one, you take off the wrapper and pop it in your mouth, not bothering to think about any consequences, negative or otherwise. It is sweet, but as you feel your earlier scrapes from being pushed to the ground soften in their intensity, you are reminded of monster food’s healing properties.

You take another, feeling a little guilty for being so greedy. You take another, and feel even worse. But still! You could never go wrong with healing foods in this monster-filled world, right? You try and convince yourself of this as you take yet another piece. Before your hands can even take the sweet from the bowl, it falls off the pedestal and tumbles to the ground, shattering. The candy is spilled everywhere.

_Oh well_. You shrug, crouching down to grab another.

**Look at what you’ve done.**

Shuddering, you decide to leave the room. Why won’t this voice leave you alone? You debate whether or not to ask Toriel about it.. But she would get worried, or, even worse, angry. And you wouldn’t even have any proof! Then her anger might change to be directed at you..

You consider this as you walk through the empty halls, coming across a small room with a table and some cheese. You walk over to the table, and hear a little squeak on the way. Glancing down reveals a small mouse hole, more squeaks coming out as you stop in front of it. You go on your way to the table, and see that the cheese is stuck to the table. It must have been there a very long time..

However, knowing that Toriel is sweet enough to leave food for even the tiniest animals, you are filled with _love_. Relaxed, you head on your way. Eventually you hit the room with the darker patches(not the one with the whole floor cracked, although you managed to navigate it yourself).

A small monster greets you, looking somewhat like a jello mold.

**Stereotypical: Curvaceously attractive, but no brains…**

You stifle a chuckle at what the voice says, glancing at the monster. It jiggles back and forth happily, blissfully unaware of your presence. You giggle, wiggling your hips a little. It wiggles back.

**What a meaningful conversation!**

You can’t help but think the voice is being a little sarcastic. _Great,_ just when you thought it might be nice. Just goes to show, never let your guard down..

The little monster makes noise, little burbles and squorches. You lay down with it, taking a rest from all the walking you’ve done.

**You lie immobile with Moldsmal. You feel like you understand the world a little better.**

So _that’s_ its name.. You pat the little slime mold on the head, and it jiggles some more.

**…**

**……..**

**………Kill it…..**

The voice is pensive, waiting, before hissing slowly and surely. Holding back a shudder(you will _not_ show any weaknesses), you get up and leave, waving a half-hearted goodbye to the Moldsmal. The voice has left you once more, but you are still uneasy. Meeting up with Toriel should help.

You walk out of the room, making your way _home_.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> wowie i LOVE scouring the wiki for info on monsters and puzzles and the EXACT dialogue and rooms in the ruins
> 
> ...eh, this chapter was pretty fun, ill admit


	11. Endearing or Pathetic?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A chapter exploring Toriel's thoughts and feelings.

Honestly, Toriel wasn’t really quite sure what to make of her new child. She knew that they weren’t really even a _child_ , they were much older than the former human that had fallen. Granted, this human in her thoughts wasn’t really upset at being called such a young-assuming name, so she shrugged it off.

They were a strange one, that was for sure. Both in good ways, _and_ bad…

The white monster loved them, that was for sure! The new inhabitant of The Ruins was very kind, if even a little timid. It seemed as though they were too _scared_ to be mean. Perhaps she could help with their shyness?

She put a furry hand to her chin in thought, browsing the aisles of the store she was in. While the rest of The Ruins could hardly be seen, there was a whole sprawling city beyond her own cozy house. It could only be seen on the path opposite the puzzles, however, so she honestly wouldn’t be surprised if the human couldn’t find her if they returned home.

While the Boss Monster was a little wary of leaving her child on their own(their nervousness did extend to separation anxiety, she assumed(and besides, they could be in danger at any moment!)), she convinced herself that education came first. Knowledge was a powerful thing, and worrying wouldn’t get her anywhere.

She glanced around the small bookstore she had entered, debating whether or not to ask the Froggit at the register if there were any books about magic. Toriel didn’t want to be any kind of bother, but the small frog-like monsters _were_ quite smart. Perhaps that was why they ran a bookstore? She chuckled softly in realization, mumbling something about being a silly old lady.

After all, that all she was, wasn’t it?

No longer was the white monster ‘Queen Toriel Dreemurr, of The Underground.’ She had fled off to her current home in a fit of anger and disgust, unable to face her husband. The horned lady supposed if she herself were merely a silly old lady, then Asgore was most certainly a pathetic _whelp_.

She shook her head at his absolute _ridiculousness_ , how he’d decided to wage a war over the death of two children. While Toriel had loved her kids dearly, this war would mean killing several others.. That was counter-intuitive, and rather unintelligent of Asgore. He was making a mountain out of a molehill, a mountain even _bigger_ than Ebott itself.

So, quite frankly, the woman didn’t regret leaving him. _Not at all_ , she tried to convince herself. _He doesn’t deserve my love anymore_.

The monster huffed softly, trying in vain to turn her thoughts elsewhere.

The Froggit at the register gave her a curious look, but didn’t pry. No need to get into anything personal, especially not after seeing how distressed she looked. Toriel could easily summon up a stoic, unfeeling persona, but her scarlet eyes betrayed everything.

The white monster skimmed through the shelves, idly biting her lower lip with a dull fang. Were there _any_ books about magic here? And, even if Toriel _did_ find any, would they be suitable for a first time learner? She let out a frustrated noise, long ears drooping slightly.

The Froggit hopped over finally, concern apparent on both of its faces. It meowed softly, asking if she was okay. The former queen looked over, initially in surprise, which soon turned to relief.

She explained her plight, and they found a good amount of books back in a dimly lit corner. The store wasn’t all too big, but the very books she needed were in a part that Toriel could not get to.

Filled with relief, she thanked the small monster, grinning and tipping it extra gold for its trouble. Flipping through one of the books, she sneezed at the thin film covering the pages. This book was very old, no doubt about that.. She would go home and clean it up, even transcribe it if needed. Toriel took good care of her books, and now that she had someone to share them with, she would be even more careful.

The child deserved no less, after all the troubles it had gone through. Falling down and getting hurt by that _dastardly_ weed couldn’t have been any good, and the horned monster was sure that she’d practically scared the little thing out of its wits when she’d tried to help.

While the furry woman _could_ have taken her introduction a bit more slowly, she had to get the human before any other monster lay their nasty claws on them. Besides, the little one would have to get used to monsters, and being saved by one was one of the best ways to go about it, wasn’t it?

Still, Toriel couldn’t shake off the look they’d given her back then.. It wasn’t one of fear, as she’d first worried, or even confusion. It was a look that was filled with… _love_ …

This human who she called child.. They loved her, yes. _Love_ d her. More than that of a kid who idolized their mother, even. This wasn’t any mere affection, and Toriel was such an _idiot_ for not seeing it sooner.

_They loved her more then a mother, more than a friend_.

Her face turned red as she walked out of the store, both from surprise and embarrassment. The former queen considered the matter more deeply as she walked through the crumbling city, gazing at the cavernous ceiling lit in calm, purple light.

The child wasn’t _that_ young, she knew _that_ much. They way they carried themselves, however..

They were shy and weary of confrontation, shamelessly crying and showing every emotion. It was as though they were made of glass, Toriel could see right through them, their thoughts, their feelings, their _love_. It was naive, innocent, but oh so _sweet…_

This human, they were an interesting one.

The monster trudged through the familiar, worn path, heading home.

She couldn’t decide… Were this child’s efforts at gaining a different kind of _love_ endearing..?

They were so kind, and listened to her, following her every instruction and whim to the best of their abilities..

Yet, as she knew how weak and afraid they were, the horned monster realized that they, a mere human who had just fallen down, wanted to woo the former been of the _entire_ Underground..?

It was almost _pathetic_.

Yet.. They way they looked up at her when they first met..

Their soft eyes were wide with wonder and amazement, lips partly open in surprise. Not a word came out, for they were frozen, entranced by the spell that Toriel had unknowingly weaved with her simple presence and appearance. Face dirty with blood an dirt, they’d hurriedly hidden it for fear of her disapproval. A polite act, but unnecessary, as she’d soOn gotten them to open up, show such _raw_ , unbridled _emotion_..

Toriel relished the memory.

She was filled with _love_.

The child.. Their mannerisms, their ways, their soft-spoken personality, all entrapped the white monster in a rush of affection.

They were certainly _endearing_.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The whole endearing/pathetic thing is a line from the game after you flirt with Tori twice btw
> 
> I'm sorry I've been so late with this, arghh.. ;; I keep you guys all waiting, and while I've been unmotivated to write some days, too distracted or busy some others, that really isn't even a good excuse, is it?
> 
> I'm a bit more active on my paigeeworld, where I draw, since I can doodle a lot faster than I can get out a whole 1000 word chapter (._.), so if you want some art that I do occasionally, than I'd be glad to have your input! It's mostly Undertale, so you guys should enjoy it. I also have a Flowey ask box there, so if that interests you, check it out, I guess.. My user is juuz0usuzuy4


	12. Apology

In such a hurry to get away from that awful voice in your head, you didn’t even bother to speak to any monsters as you made your way home. A Froggit gave you a strange look, but didn’t say anything, confused at your sudden change of attitude. The tiny creature shrugged it off, and you were too busy crossing into the next room to feel relieved that it forgave you.

Red leaves crunched under your feet, and while you would usually enjoy playing in them, the color unnerved you. You weren’t quite sure why, but that bright red reminded you of your perpetual, malevolent companion. You’d never even seen the fellow, but suddenly they struck you as red. Red was a color of violence and danger, of war and.. _Blood_.

You hastily push the thought from your mind, instead wondering if you could grab some candy from that spare room. You remember your companion mocking you however, and that sweet taste you’d been craving turns sour in your mind. The candy you’d grabbed is in your pockets still, but now feels more like a weight than anything.. You _would_ pass it off on one of the many monsters that populate these twisting paths, but don’t want to get caught up in any monster sequences, and thus be taunted any longer.

That stupid voice needed a name, for the sake of calling it something, _anything_ better, more creative than ‘that stupid voice.’ You supposed, until you learned their name(you hoped you’d never get close enough to), you’d call them ‘Red.’

-

When you finally arrive home, Toriel is sitting in an armchair, a hefty pile of books on her lap. You hold back a groan, really in the mood for some motherly love and comfort(the latter especially) at the moment. However much you loved books, they were taking _your_ rightful spot!

At the sound of the door creaking open, and thus heralding your return, Toriel looks up with a surprised smile. “Ah, my child! Did you have fun on your adventures? Do not worry about me, I was just fetching some books so that I could teach you about magic!” She rambled on, excited. While it was nice to see her so lively, her eyes bright, you found you really couldn’t appreciate it all. ‘Red’ just got you out of the mood for anything.

In all honesty, if this is the way Toriel was going to be, you wanted to go to your room and take a nap. Thoughts of learning… didn’t really bring back the best memories.. Had you _mentioned_ your sucky grades? _Yeesh_.

You frown in thought to yourself, but snap out of it as Toriel rises from her seat, pile of books discarded. The tall monster walks over to you slowly, concern evident across her features. _Great_. You gulp uncertainly. _Now you’ve made her worry, nice job trying to get away._

“Dear..” She picks her words carefully, occasionally stopping to chew on her lip. “You _did_ enjoy your venture, did you not?” Her ears seem to droop even further, if possible, as she waits for an answer.

_What to say? Oh, Toriel, don’t mind me, I’m just being plagued by this mysterious, murderous voice and now that I’m finally home with you, you’re expecting me to sit quietly and learn while in the midst of a panic attack, and oh, did I mention, you’re setting yourself up for disappointment because I’m not as smart as you think?_

You let out a bitter laugh at the possibility, and seeing that Toriel looks confused, hurry to fabricate some easy lie about your situation. You mumble something about being lonely, and how being with monsters you didn’t quite know made you kinda nervous. You are wrapped in your guardian’s soft embrace before you even realize what’s going on, and realize after a moment that she is whispering to you.

You’re too tired and received to make anything out, but it sounds like apologies and other sweet nothings meant to soothe you. And it’s working too, you find, as you relax into her warm arms. Toriel hums something softly, a lilting tune that sounds familiar. The weird déjà vu is back, you _swear_ you’ve heard this tune before.

“My child..” She is talking at a normal volume now, but her voice is soft and velvety nonetheless. “Would you like to come to the garden with me? I have something to show you.” While you don’t particularly _want_ to walk all the way through The Ruins to find the destination she speaks of, you figure it’d be a good way to get rid of the nervous energy that is causing your _nerves_ themselves to buzz. Besides, you hadn’t even taken off your shoes, so it wasn’t like you had to do too much preparation-wise.

Toriel guides you a rather long way, longer than you’d expected. You take a short detour to the room where the floor is uneven and crumbling, and she takes you into one of the rooms that lie below, demanding that some monster you’d never before seen apologize to you. It looks like a giant carrot, grin turning to a more sheepish smile as it hastily utters out something uncertain. It seems to do the trick however, and you find yourself back on the main path. Having time to think on it, you realize that your guardian probably felt guilty for letting the monsters scare you, and wanted to make up for it. While she hadn’t gone about in quite the correct way, it cheers you slightly that she cares. Besides, you couldn’t deny that the irony of dragging some monster you’d never before seen to do the apologizing was rather amusing.

Still, as you look around, the scenery is nothing unusual.. Just things you hadn’t seen in a while. Things you hadn’t seen since you’d first fallen down, since that _flower_ tried to _kill_ \- You nip the thought in the bud, thinking better. You’re with your guardian, why worry about past dangers when you’re so obviously safe?

You’re soon past the room where that plant tried to maul you, and are calmer. Toriel stands at a patch of flowers in the first room you’d seen upon awakening underground, and stops to spread her arms. She looks happy, and excited.

“Dear child, this is my favorite bug-hunting spot.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm SORRY  
> heres ur new chapter i promised  
> happy bday to me


	13. Hunting For Love

_Bug hunting?_ Not what you’d call the best use of your time, but at least Toriel was there. You glanced around the area, uncertain. Crumbling columns stretched up towards the ceiling, towards.. The _Sun?_

You let out a soft noise of apprehension, unused to its harsh, bright light. In all honestly, while you’d at first found The Ruins’ lowly-lit dimness a bit unnerving and even _hard_ on your sight, you’d come to grow used to it. Seeing such light after so long.. It was painful.

You turned to face away from it, shielding your eyes. The Sun was something you’d left behind, no use in gazing after it again. You’d long abandoned your world, now left to the mercy of monsters. And honestly, as you watched your guardian expectantly waiting your reaction with a smile, you didn’t regret it _one_ bit.

Well, except for maybe the whole part about how your jumping down was meant to _kill_ yourself.

But hey, Toriel was happy, and you were too! Who needed to keep such a tight grip on the past when you were _free_ now, to do _whatever_ you wanted?

You turned to your guardian with a smile, thanking her for taking you to such a place. While it brought back some painful memories, you could easily make new, _better_ ones to take their place, right here, right _now_!

“Oh, I’m so glad you’re happy, my child!” She grinned, lips curling upwards in happiness. “This is my _favorite_ spot in The Ruins!” The white monster looked around, then gestured from you to come over to a small patch of flowers. They were kept tidy and well-grown, or at least.. It seemed like they _were_ , at one point?

At the current moment, the plants were yes, bright and vibrant still, but quite frankly? _Squished_. Their stems were bent, petals rumpled and folded. What had once been a modest little spot of happiness in this underground world was now a testament to what outside influence did.

**How poetic.**

You frowned, feeling guilt wash over as you realized that these were the plants that had somehow miraculously kept you from breaking any bones on your fall down. Gulping slowly, you kept your gaze on the sunlight ground, apologizing quietly. 

Toriel cocked her head in confusion, then laughed. _What? Was she laughing at_ you _?_ You looked up, brows quirked. “Oh, dear,” she put a hand on your shoulder, her furry body trembling softly with laughter. “Don’t be sorry!” This only puzzled you further. _What about the way she’d looked at those flowers, had_ cared _for them?_ “I may have loved these flowers, but now, because of them, I have you!”

“And I _love_ you, much more than I could love any plant!”

She chuckled as her cheeks flushed a slight pink, wondering why it embarrassed her to be admitting something that should have been so obvious. You stared up at her in shock, face cycling through every shade of pink and red and growing darker by the second. You stuttered out an agreement, casting your eyes elsewhere.

While you wanted to explore the cavern, you seemed to be frozen in place by embarrassment, but more by.. Something you really, _really_ wanted to say.. Did Toriel know _how_ you loved her? Did she.. _love_ you the _same_ way..? You didn’t want to make the moment awkward, and thus ruin it, but you _really_ had to know.

You called out her name quietly, gritting your teeth in preparation. “My dear?” She perked up, still laughing off her flushed cheeks. “What do you need?” You cleared your throat, looking up. You didn’t dare meet Toriel’s eyes however, looking off to the side to stare down a crumbling column behind her. Close enough. “Are you okay?” The monster moved closer, but you flinched away.

“Toriel.” You bit your lip. “How…. _much…_ do you love me?” You coughed awkwardly, digging your fingernails into your palms. _You started, you can’t give up now!_ “I mean.. I.. Uh..” You hesitated, gaze wandering down to the flower patch. “I love you, like.. a _lot_. More than I should, since I don’t really know you and you call me ‘child,’ but..” Looking at the plants that separated you and your guardi- _Oh give it up, it’s_ obvious _she’s your crush_ \- you remember your first meeting.

Being tormented by that little flower.. You, aching all over from your fall, and not the least bit athletic to boot, were left at its practically nonexistent MERCY. You remember dodging bullets in fear, and being yelled at, so _harshly_ reprimanded, for doing so. You remember the tears begin to fall, the mocking, squealing tone that ceaselessly teased you, the inescapable ring of seeds ready to get you, to burrow past your clothes, past your skin, into your very SOUL.

You were so dizzy, the experience a _major_ overdose of adrenaline that had you stumbling. You caught a bullet to the face, waiting for the rest to come, but.. They never did.

All of a sudden, the flower was gone, and in its place, the wonderful woman you’d come to know and to depend upon. The monster, Toriel, you’d come to _love_.

From then on you’d been safe, cared for and.. Loved _back_.

But.. How _much_ did she love you?

“I-I…” You looked up in an abrupt act of courage, staring into Toriel’s red eyes. They were soft, although whether with endearment or amusement you could not tell. “I.. I think you’re really pretty, and you’re very nice and sweet, and- and.. I love you..” You looked away again with the ending statement, face feeling so hot and sweaty you were sure that you’d _melt_ in your own bashfulness.

“Romantically..?” Toriel asked, voice wavering. You gulped, nodding slowly. You were just about to be washed away in a fit of shame, until you heard her next. At first, the furry woman chuckled, and you inwardly groaned. _Now look what you’ve done, going off and professing your love like an_ idiot _. She probably thinks it’s some sick joke._

“… I’m glad I’m not the only one feeling that way.”

Your head shot straight up in surprise at her words. _She felt the same way? Wait, you were probably taking this all out of proportion, she couldn’t possibly.._

“At first, I wasn’t sure..” She twiddled her large, clawed hands slowly, smiling softly. Her cheeks had turned darker, and her scarlet eyes were cast towards the ground, every action screaming in sheepishness. “But, yes, I _do_ love you as well. …. _Romantically_..” She laughed at her own stumbling over the word, looking up shyly.

You watched her carefully, brushing your raggedy bangs from your eyes to reveal a rather received expression. “Oh gosh, I thought you were going to think I was an idiot, or something, I mean I-”

Her arms always found a way to wrap you before you even knew what was happening, as if she had weird teleportation powers or something. _Could monsters even do that?_ You were barely left to your thoughts for a moment, because as you were only seconds into considering it, you noticed that your face was mere inches from Toriel’s.

She smiled. “May I?”

You stuttered uncertainly, asking what on _earth_ she was going to do, but then you _realized_.

You barely had a chance to nod before her lips were on yours.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> romantic buildup is finally coming to an end!!! i was worried about rushing it, because i wanted this story to seem realistic(at least for someone who is shy and/or anxious about being romantic/confessing their feelings), but i may have ended up waiting a little long... but i was excited to write this chapter finally, so u get it early uwu


	14. The True Name

_Wow._

That kiss was so wonderful, so amazing, so.. You couldn’t even think of any more words to describe it that weren't basically synonyms of the other two. Fantastic, incredible, brilliant. You didn’t, in that one moment, regret a single thing about jumping into this new world. Everything was sublime.

Your face still tingled from where her soft lips had been pressed up against yours. You could still feel the soft breath curling from her nose onto your upper lip. Your eyes were closed, trying desperately to remember every minute detail about those few seconds in time. Your veins were buzzing like static from a tv, senses still overloaded even hours later.

Your cheeks, of course, were still flushed red, even darker than the maroon stripe emblazoned across your warm sweater. You laid on your bed, seemingly asleep at one’s first glance. Opening your eyes, you scrutinized the beige ceiling, as if it could give you an explanation for Toriel’s sudden show of her reciprocated love.

You still couldn’t believe she actually _loved_ you! Who would’ve thought that? Certainly not you, what with your ever self-decimating train of thought. An even _aside_ from Red’s ever so constant nagging, you were far too easily distracted, oblivious to others’ feelings and thoughts towards you.

Speaking of distractions, you smelled the sweet scent of Toriel’s signature cinnamon-butterscotch pie.. Sweet, just like the cook herself. You smiled at your small joke, glad that she’d decided to heat up the remains of yesterday’s cooking. However delicious pie was on its own, you’d far rather prefer it to be warm while you consumed it.

Tossing your legs over the side of the cozy bedspread, you uprighted yourself and stretched. It was evening, it seemed, but you could still wait to fall asleep. Dinner was coming up anyhow, you didn’t want to miss it. Still, as you let out a yawn, you couldn’t deny that the days events were certainly taxing. Both bodily _and_ mentally.

You pushed yourself from the bed, turning on the lamp with a pull of its beaded cord. The melody piping through the room became softer in its intensity, sounding more like a guitar than a music box. As light brightened the room, you decided to search the toy chest once more. No harm in feeding your childish whims, especially since your guardian(should you be calling her your lover now?) called you her child. Would she stop doing so, now that you’d confessed your feelings? You’d have to see for yourself later.

Spotting the dusty bear from earlier searching, you wince. Had it _really_ only been that morning that you’d first seen it? It felt like days, if not weeks, since you’d seen it, due to all your experiences. You still couldn’t believe that, all in one day, you managed to give Toriel a scare by blatantly scratching at yourself(after having a (hallucination induced? you had no idea if Red was real or not) panic attack), then somehow managing to get her to explain her past, afterwards exploring the Ruins you now called home _and_ finally confessing your love.. And she’d returned your affections no less! What a day indeed..

You find yourself absentmindedly stroking the stuffed bear, gingerly avoiding the tears in the fabric so as not to damage it further. It seems Red has quieted down, and you relax, ever so slightly. You wonder.. Is Red even _real?_ None of the monsters seemed to react when they spoke, so could they even hear them? This, of course, furthered your assumption that the voice was solely situated in your head. But, the real question.. Were you imagining this all? Did your fall make you crazy? Or was this kind of thing just normal down here?

You at first think that it wouldn’t be wise to consult Toriel on your troubles. What if she thought you were insane? _Were_ you insane? You let out a soft sigh. Could it _really_ hurt _that_ much? You’d thought that the woman would disown you for your romantic feelings towards her, but she’d returned them. Perhaps she could help you with this as well? Not that Red had bugged you in the last few hours… But still.. You didn’t want to take any risks.

You glance at the toy chest chest one last time, and a bold voice croons in your mind, almost _mockingly_. **Look at all these cool toys! They don’t interest you at all _._** That sets you off. You pick yourself up from the floor, pushing open your bedroom door with a single regret.

Toriel is cooking up some vegetables, and turns to look at you when you march inside the kitchen. She cocks her head in interest, raising a single brow in an unasked(at least verbally) question. You gulp, not feeling quite so sure about things anymore.

Trying to explain it the best you can, you stumble and stutter over your words. She has set long down the pan of food, fire magic fading fast from her hands. “My dear…” The monster is quiet, hesitant to speak. “You say that you hear a voice in your head?” You pause, before nodding. At least she isn’t taking this as badly as you’d feared. “And it sounds young?” She continued, and you nodded again. “And they threaten you?” You twist your hands together, looking down. You nod a third time, refusing to meet her eyes.

“But..” You speak up, staring practical holes into the wooden floorboards. “I don’t think they’re… _Mean_ … Or, at least.. _Trying_ to be..?” You can’t believe what you’re saying. Isn’t this the person, the _thing_ , the disembodied voice that had goaded you into killing a monster(or tried to, anyhow) and had frightened you into an unfeeling numbness?! “They.. They’re just a child, do they even _know_ what they’re saying..?” What they’re _doing..?_

Toriel’s other brow rises up slowly, and she gives you a wide-eyed glance. “Child, do you know what they look like..?” You shake your head, than start to think better. Glancing around, you ask if there is any paper, or pencils. Toriel seems to catch wind of your idea fairly quickly, and hurries off. She soon returns with a a notebook, a journal from the looks of it, and some broken crayons. The white monster gives you a small smile, apologizing. “I am sorry. I couldn’t find anything else on such sort notice.” You tell her there is no need to rush, and take the book and crayons.

You think to yourself for a moment before drawing. your hands are shaky, and you try to calm them as you consider that, from the sound of Red’s voice, they are a child. You draw a rather small, stubby figure, giving them medium length hair, as you couldn’t quite tell their gender from their voice. Did they even have one? You only now realize that it is quite possible that Red isn’t even _human_. There are monsters, and even a talking flower(did that even _count_ as a monster?) down here, why be so narrow minded?

Still.. Something about them just struck you as.. Mortal. _Human._ You’d started your drawing as such, and crayons weren’t erasable anyways, so you continued on your way. Since they (presumably) lived around here in The Ruins, you gave them a woolly sweater like the ones Toriel had in the closet for you.

Really, you were just going on random colors by now aside from giving them pale skin(as there wasn’t much sunlight in the underground). Green and tan sweater, brown pants, brown hair, the like. Although.. You figured, since they gave you such a _red_ feeling, they needed something as such. You gave them two little dots, red eyes.

Giving the drawing a once-over, you nodded, and looked up to see what Toriel thought. Your blood ran cold as you saw that she was staring at the paper in a mix of horror and shock, her dark eyes wide in confusion. She picked it up, and a single, familiar word left her lips.

“..Chara..?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> im sorry for taking forever school started and its awful  
> but!!! thanks for over a 100 kudos and nearly 2000 hits  
> i love yall  
> you guys keep me going on this  
> im having lots of fun with it and hope you enjoy it


	15. But Somebody Came

As she spoke, your eyes widened. _Her child?_ You remember the photo album she’d pulled from the shelf to show off that morning, and your eyes instinctively flicked over towards it. As you moved, stepping forward, to grab it, Toriel gave you a warning look. _Not now_ , her red eyes seemed to say. “Why don’t we just..” her voice was on the verge of cracking, but she calmed herself, deflating a little. “…Leave it for another time.” As you were ushered off to your room, you heard her take a deep breath to compose herself. “I’ll see you in the morning, it’s best you get some rest, dear.”

Any and all protests you uttered were shut off as she closed the door. You expected to hear the monster walk off to her big chair to read, as you noticed she seemed to do on most evenings, but you didn’t. Footsteps shuffled left instead of right, and the door next to yours opened and shut with a force that sent tingles down your spine. Was Toriel _angry?_ You crawled over onto your bed and propped yourself up against the wall, trying to listen through the wood paneling.

Trying to discern any sounds aside from the distant meow of a random Froggit, you pressed your ear to the wall. A scratching sound meets your ears, and you strain to hear it better. Toriel had claws, but she wouldn’t be so rough as to scratch something, would she? Was she _that_ distressed? You hear the light rustle of paper, like the turning of a book’s page. Was she flipping through another photo album, one she kept in her room?

The scratching picked up again, and you flopped back on your blankets in defeat. Wracking your brain in confusion, you realize that she might be writing in a journal or some such. It strikes you as such a motherly thing, you can’t help but smile, if only slightly. Different people use different coping methods, you knew that much from experience. Whatever helped helped.

You only hope that Toriel is okay.. It’d be a shame if this ruined your chances for your newly budding relationship, as selfish as that sounded. Of course, even being as tired as you were, you weren’t going to get a mere wink of sleep anytime soon. Knocking on your newly designated lover(it still felt _weird_ to call her that)’s door crossed your mind, but you thought better and decided to leave her be.

You cracked your own door open after getting to your feet, mentally readying an excuse about using the bathroom if the monster were to hear and inquire about your intentions. However, if seemed as though she was none the wiser and you steadily slinked down the wooden corridor, wary of any creaky boards. This _was_ a fairly old house, after all.

The fireplace crackled warmly, sending the shadows in the room dancing. The photo album stuck out from the rest of the books like a sore thumb now that you knew the memories and sentimentality that it contained, but you gritted your teeth, steeled yourself, and turned away. Maybe some fresh air would do you good? A walk would help you clear your thoughts.

You crept to the front door, hastily unlocking it and slipping out. Maybe you’d get lucky, and Toriel would be too preoccupied with the sudden revelation that her child was still alive(well, mostly) to notice your quick excursion. The paths outside were as dimly lit as ever, lavender light seeming to almost pulse slowly with an ancient, magical energy that only a Monster civilization could have.

A Froggit hopped out of your path as you meandered to your left, letting out a croak. You gave it a soft smile, shoving your hands in your pockets to keep them out of the nipping breeze. It was nice out, the soft colors rather ambient and calming without so many monsters about. Taking a new trail oh a whim, you glanced around at the perpetual ivy that crept along the crumbling bricks and columns.

As you walked, not too further, it seemed to get brighter, and you briefly wondered if you’d stumbled upon another hole that lead up aboveground. Once you turned the corner, you saw something even more awe-inspiring. While not as bright as the sun, or even the moon’s light, there lay a city below the precipice you found yourself as the edge of, towers and spires reaching to the darkness above. Lights shone from the buildings themselves, as though the bricks themselves were imbued with their own sources of luminescence.

You sat down, figuring that even if you hadn’t walked far, you’d reached a nice place to think. You always assumed that the Ruins were rather small, but the buildings seemed to stretch off into a far off, if nonexistent horizon. Despite the monsters that perpetually roamed the other pathways, you seemed so alone in that one moment. It really struck you how these were crumbling _ruins_ left behind from civilizations long gone.

You leaned back, laying against the cool ground and staring up into the inky black abyss  that no doubt ended in harsh, craggy rock. You were under a mountain. You were trapped down here, but you felt so free. Free from previous worries in life up above, free from the judging looks of your peers, of _humanity_ in general.

As you shifted your hands back to lay them beneath your head, you felt something beneath them. Sitting up, you turned around to inspect it in the ambient purple light. It appeared to be a knife of some sort, but made of plastic and worn quite thin. You’d assume it belonged to a child, but the only children you knew to be in the Underground were long lost, weren’t they?

Tucking the knife in your pocket, you decided you’d best keep it, if only to keep some innocent monster from tripping on it. No need to show Toriel, at least not until you were sure she’d gotten over her shock. No doubt she was worried about you, you should have been long asleep.

Still.. You wormed your hand into your pocket, feeling the cold plastic under your dirty fingers. I had to belong to _someone_. You wracked your mind, remembering that Toriel was one of the few, if even the _only_ monster you’d seen with actual hands. Could the knife have belonged to one of her children, left behind for so long?

It was the only logical possibility that crossed your mind, and you decided that that must have been the case. And of course, you would have stuck with that, had you not heard an all too familiar voice amongst your thoughts.

**Made of plastic. A rarity nowadays.**

Well, you _knew that._

**It’s not mine. It never was.**

**But it’s yours now.**

You half expected a snide comment about killing someone with it, but Chara had gone silent.

Chara.

What a nice name.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> boy, its been a while, huh?  
> sorry  
> i really am  
> i know this is stereotypical and cliche, but school really has been hard  
> thanks for those of you that keep reminding me of this uwu


End file.
